Sunday, August 28, 2011

The Most Hated Yankee Index

Listen. Sometimes you just need to take 16 months off from blogging about the Yankees, OK? Sometimes shit happens. Sometimes you start writing other blogs, and occasionally vent about the Yankees over there.

And sometimes a player drives you so batshit insane with rage that you have to return to your home to write about him there.

Sometimes A.J. Burnett happens.

Most of us knew that the Burnett signing was a potentially disastrous idea in that fateful winter of 2008. We lived with the ups and downs of Burnett in 2009, and we lived with him single-handedly losing a crucial World Series game, because the team's success distracted us from what an ill-conceived signing Burnett actually was.

The other shoe dropped in 2010, and this year, that shoe has kicked us in the face so many teams we look like that lady who got her face eaten by a chimp. Pre-surgery.

Burnett is an awful pitcher -- one of the worst full-time starters in baseball -- and he's paid like one of the best. That part's not his fault; we all take as much money as we can get. Neither is it Burnett's fault that both Joe Girardi and Brian Cashman have shown a maddening predilection to defend him even when he's indefensible. Yankees brass insults the intelligence of every fan who pays to see the team when they claim that Burnett was yelling about a pitch call when Girardi pulled him from the Twins game, or that he's "pitching like a quality starter."

What is Burnett's fault, though, is his awful performance and his dense reaction to said performance. For someone with such "electric stuff," he sure seems unwilling to tinker with his mechanics to try to improve his results.

After each game in which he doesn't give his team a chance to win, he tells the media that he's "out there battling," and that he'll get better next time. A.J. Burnett is full of shit.

As such, he's rapidly ascending my personal list of the most loathsome Yankee of all time. Or at least of my lifetime. Here's where we're at right now.

1. Kevin Brown
2. Randy Johnson
3. A.J. Burnett
4. Carl Pavano
5. Roger Clemens
6. Ruben Sierra
7. Kyle Farnsworth
8. Luis Polonia
9. Mel Hall
10. Chad Curtis

Wow. In just a short time, Burnett has already skyrocketed past a cheater, a rapist and Carl Pavano. Truly impressive. And Randy Johnson is no doubt feeling nervous and looking over his shoulder as the playoffs approach.